Oh, hi again.
It’s been a while.
Guess what? These days I’m working on the stuff I’ve been dreaming about since high school. Can I say I’m living the dream? Feels kinda cool to tell my younger self, “Relax girl, you’ll be fine.”
But you know what, I never thought happiness is actually way beyond looks or status. It’s bigger than what you see.
Like, yeah, I got it. At first, I was super proud of myself. But hey, the world keeps spinning, life doesn’t just stop there. New challenges come, new people show up, and honestly, I never thought “living the dream” could feel a little empty.
Back in school, that whole academic journey was so exciting. I kept pushing myself, learned a ton, laughed, cried… all hoping it’d take me here. And bro, I seriously enjoyed the ride.
But being real—now that I’m here, it doesn’t give me the sparks, the butterflies, the joy I thought it would.
Writing this makes me realize maybe it was about two things before:
The Dream. It’s always in your head. It gives you purpose. You want it, you chase it, you live for it.
The People. Man, I’ve always been fueled by the people around me. Not just mentors, but family and friends too. Lol, I’m cracking up at myself because I used to wish I could be in a place where I could compete better (like outside my hometown). And now—OMG—I just feel so lonelyyy.
Or maybe this is just the price I have to pay in return?
Still, I’m hoping everything will feel just as cool while I’m actually having fun doing it.
